Breaking the Hardness
Inside Me
Life in itself is most complex to understand at full face
value – there are many hidden factors too hard to comprehend. We have been
taught that whatsoever a human being or mortal soul sows is what he or she
shall also reap; I believe in karma and at its best, karma has never let me
down.
I tried my best to spread the seeds of happiness, compassion
and kindness in my own special ways – I am sure I did my best and I doubt I was
perfect but they were done nevertheless with love for mankind in mind. I would
hope that because I also sowed the seeds of happiness, in return, I would
receive the same…………. and waiting.
Still, I remain humble, patient and waiting for the signs
that shows a positive progression in my life towards my goal to reach a
greatness…………..no, not a personal self-serving greatness but rather, an
opportunity that the words I have written will reach someone’s mind enough to
change the heart.
In life, I have been a warrior, a soldier, a healer and a
teacher; I have walked, crawled and ran in my life to catch my soul. I sowed the seed given to me and planted what I
could in return for better wisdom and finding some royalty in my existence. Sometimes,
when the light is dark I forget that what I sow is what I reap yet what I reap
is not what I expected.
Only God knows what I need, only God knows what the best is
for me. l am helpless against the world when it comes to power. I am helpless
against the world when it comes to hate and forgiveness. I have tried them both
and although I have been partially successful, there is still some darkness in
my heart.
I reap what I sow; I cannot get rid of all the evil inside
my heart. My mind works hard to rid its spell cast upon me when I was young and
it has festered for many years to harden my veins, my soul and my heart. I want
to break the toughness.
I want to show flexibility and pleasure but I cannot win
this fight until I surrender my body and soul to the faith and hop that has
guided me so far in life. I am trying; I am producing and I pray we all join in
and become better in showing our love for each other but yet, we are not yet there.
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